3 Wishes

This guy is on a rooftop about to jump off. His wife has left him, he has lost his job, and he owes thousands of pounds to the bank. Just as he finishes his prayers and closes his eyes, ready to jump, Santa taps him on the shoulder.

'Are you OK?', Santa asks.

The man explains why he is so miserable and gets ready to jump.

'STOP!', shouts Santa, 'I will grant you three wishes on the understanding that you do me a favour.'

'Would you?', the man replies, 'that would be wonderful! Thank you, thank you!'

Santa grants him the three wishes: 1. You shall go home in one hour and your wife will be dressed in her sexy underwear, begging for forgiveness and longing for your return. She will have no recollection of her new boyfriend.

2. You shall go into work tomorrow, sit at your desk and continue with your work. Your salary will have increased by 50percent. Also, nobody will have any recollection of your sacking.

3. You shall go to your bank and you will be in credit, you will have no outstanding bills.

'Oh thank you, thank you!' says the man, 'what is it i can do for you?'

Santa tell the man to drop his pants and bend over. After a quite brutal rogering, Santa asks the man how old he is.

The man answers, 'Thirty six'.

'Your a bit old to believe in Father Christmas!' laughs the jolly fat man.

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